I get so excited right around this time of year. A few of my hockey buddies and I get together each year (3rd year now) and do the unthinkable to all hockey purists. We play Fantasy Football.
That's right, 8 of us spend 3 hours drafting through 16 rounds of QBs, RBs & kickers. Countless hours of research on what Defense to take, and what round to do it in. Even the creativity behind the team names we choose requires an intense passion for competition. Jersey Shore Creepers is Lowell's band of misfits. He commissions our league and plays the "know-it-all" role, yet he won the Toilet Bowl last season (7th out of 8 teams). The only team worse than that would be the "Under-Estimators" lead by Mikey. The remaining 6 teams include: Morbo's Marauders (Knipper), Brand Country (Nate Brand-how creative), Mitch Kumstein (Clutts), Blackhawks (Mark Dylo is not fully on board with the whole football thing), Beastman (Bast), and Green Snap (My team named after a crop insurance endorsement you put on field corn).
If you've made it this far through this blog entry, I commend you. Most of my millions of die-hard followers would have stopped after the "We play Fantasy Football" entry located at the beginning of this article. They want to hear about hockey, not a sport where only 16 games are played in a season (that count), once per week, where plays typically last 5-9 seconds with MANY commercials in between. I am not hear to disappoint. The Fantasy Football topic segues nicely into Fantasy Hockey.
Browsing through Barnes & Noble or Borders (not for comics Johnson, so relax), I notice countless books on helping you draft the 15-1 Fantasy Football team. I scan past the Muscle & Fitness, Aviation Weekly & JET magazines to finally find a handfull of Fantasy Hockey Guides. Although the selection is not the greatest, I still find the one I want (why in the world do you put Stamkos on the cover?) and get ready to head out. Wait a minute, I forgot one other important item and that is the ever elusive 2010-11 Fantasy Guide to ABC League Hockey. Not only is it elusive, it is non-existent. Unfair. How does Ben Hudson determine whether or not McCallum is a great pick-up as a defensemen this year for his fantasy team, or another over-rated Canadian?
So for all you skating statisticians, I give you some advice and guidance to help make your Fantasy C League Team better than ever.
The first thing you need to know is that scoring for Fantasy ABC Hockey is much different than the traditional point systems in most NHL leagues. Sure you get points for goals & assists, but its those "other" categories that make or break a Fantasy Season. Here is a breakdown of the Top 10 rated players in the ABC League and why they're stats will give you that much needed value.
10. Tres Hewlett (Puck Hawgs)- 5 points per game are given to a player for every game they sit on injured reserve. That's making bank on this pick.
9. Dave Green (Cup O Kryptonite) - Each player gets their BAC (blood alcohol content) checked after the game. The higher the level, the more points earned. Look for an easy 0.2 - 0.4 per game from this consistent player.
8. Aaron Clutts (Alien) - Each time a player trips on a break-a-way opportunity without the help of an opponent earns 10 points. Clutts is capable of 16-18 of those per season.
7. Dane Maxwell (Irwins) - You think goal scorer right? Wrong. Points here are earned at a rate of 1 for every minute late to a game. No Brainer on this one.
6. Kacy Reeves (YDD) - Most leagues give bonus points for shutouts. We give them to a goalie if they lets in more than 8 goals in one game. In a 30 week season, I'm betting 10+ games.
5. Justin West (Funky Pickle) - Some leagues track +/-, we track DFG (distance from goal) measured in feet. Once a puck goes into a corner, the defending team's furthest player from the puck (aka "the cherry picker") gets point for how far away from the play they can be. West has been ranked #1 in this category last 6 years in a row.
4. Dan Bishop (Alien) /Scott Anderson (Kryptonite) - You can't go wrong with either netminder in this category. Points are awarded for every $100 spent on new gear within a given season. Look for between $14,000 - $18,000 spent individually depending on winter road conditions to Minneapolis.
3. Nathan Pirie (YDD) - Virtual unknown and new player to league will amass many points in the category of borrowing equipment. Between borrowing a jock every game and sharing gloves on line changes, this sleeper will make any Fantasy team a contender.
2. Brian Hobbs (Funky Pickle) - Being ambidextrous in hockey earns MAJOR points. If a player scores 2 goals (shooting forehand) with both a left handed stick & right handed stick in the same game, they earn 50 points. If you've never watched Hobbsy transfer hand to hand during a game.....its amazing.
1. Laura Stein (Kryptonite) - With most leagues, a player's +/- is an excellent indicator of their strength on the ice. In our league, it's no different, other than points are awarded to players that are the most detrimental to their team by allowing goals when they are on the ice. Stein's minus 147 was the worst ever in D League last season (even compared to a horrendous minus-82 by Bill Mikkelson of the 1974-75 Washington Capitals which is an NHL record) should earn any Fantasy captain all the points they need to dominate their league.
Well there you have it. I just saved everyone $6.99 at the newsstand, and maybe even added a little extra in your pocket by moving your team up in the standings and taking a share of the big pot we all play for. Watch throughout the season as I add my "Sleeper Pick of the Week" to help give you that extra push towards greatness.
3 comments:
Five points come on, that is way over rated. I am lucky to get 5 points a month any more, but I appreciate the sentiment. Here is to hoping the week 1 is the only one I am missing this year.
I don't know how Hobbs does it. Dude can barely skate as it is, yet he's out there switching hands at least once a shift. Nice observation, Joe.
And we all know that Bitchop is the first to admit that he has more money than talent. I just hope he doesn't think there is a correlating ratio between how much he spends and how well he will actually play.
And of course Tres "Ouch, my V hurts" Hewlitt is the first to comment. What else would I expect from the head coach in a league that doesn't have coaches?
I'll leave everyone else alone, since I don't want to be dodging pucks all season long.
The ref bringing some love.....i like it. So much for our refs being impartial. But afterall, i guess we get what we pay for.
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