Spotlighting the Stars & Predictions

This week we take an opportunity to spotlight some of our league superstars.  We took a top player from each team and asked them the same questions.  You may know these players on the ice, but do you really know them off the ice?  This should give you a look inside the private life of some our very own.

Name: Brendan McCallum
Team: Alien
Years Played hockey: 34
Favorite Hockey player: Mike Modano

Favorite Hockey movie: Strange Brew
Occupation: Iowa Wild Strength & Conditioning Coach
Pre-Game Meal: NY Strip Steak topped with bacon
Superstition: Always wear a Team USA t-shirt under my gear
Quote: "Ask not what you can do for your team, ask what beer your team can buy for you"

Name: Brad Dean
Team: Cup O' Kryptonite
Years Played hockey: 61,320 hours
Favorite Hockey player: Crosby or Malkin
Favorite Hockey movie: Mystery Alaska
Occupation: Iowa Energy Power Forward
Pre-Game Meal: Cocoa Krispies

Superstition: Always has Rich Huyck tie his skates
Quote: "I am the chosen one....bow down to me"

Name: Andrew Mellein
Team: Forlifts of Des Moines / Kyles Bikes
Years Played hockey: Since leaving the womb
Favorite Hockey player: Jaromir Jagr (but only when he played for the Flyers)
Favorite Hockey movie: Love Guru
Occupation: Used Car Salesman
Pre-Game Meal:  2 shots of whiskey

Superstition: Look in mirror pre-game and say "I will succeed" three times 
Quote: "How much puck, would a chuck a puck chuck if a chuck a puck could chuck pucks"

Name: Gregory Propst
Team: Puckheads
Years Played hockey:  3 weeks
Favorite Hockey player: Derek Hickey
Favorite Hockey movie: Slapshot 2
Occupation: Motivational Speaker
Pre-Game Meal: A full tube of Jimmy Dean sausage (uncooked)

Superstition: Show up to the rink 1 full day before game and meditate in locker room 3
Quote: "shhhhhh....someone may hear you"

Name: Shaun Greene
Team: Red Alert
Years Played hockey:  12 (only 4 professionally)
Favorite Hockey player: Zarley Zalapski
Favorite Hockey movie: Hockey Mom

Occupation: Children's Book Writer
Pre-Game Meal: 2 hot dogs, bowl of chili & a diet Coke
Superstition: Puts on all gear first and jock last
Quote: Cross me on the ice, and watch your back"

Name: Brad Bedwell
Team: Rink Rats
Years Played hockey: Not long enough
Favorite Hockey player: Jenny Schmidgall-Potter 

Favorite Hockey movie:  MVP-Most Valuable Primate
Occupation: Ski Instructor
Pre-Game Meal: Hostess Ding Dongs
Superstition:  Take a sip of his goalies water bottle between periods
Quote: "Burn me once shame on you, burn me twice..shame on you again"

Name: Dave Natale
Team: Victors
Years Played hockey: 2 years (since last cioncussion)
Favorite Hockey player: Mickey Mantle
Favorite Hockey movie: Youngblood

Occupation:  Unemployed
Pre-Game Meal:  Anything Dave Gannon brings him
Superstition: Be the first on the ice and take a slapshot in warm ups on the opposing goalie
Quote: "I can do backwards crossovers while skating forward"

Name: Nick Dawson
Team: Voodoo
Years Played hockey: 47 years
Favorite Hockey player: Brent Gretzky
Favorite Hockey movie: PeeWee All-Star 1997 Home Video
Occupation:  Prison Guard
Pre-Game Meal:  Tofu Salad

Superstition: Skate to penalty box during warm ups and set down water bottle to visit it later
Quote: "Palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy, there's vomit on my sweater already, mom's spaghetti"

Predictions this week:
Kryptonite (1) Voodoo (2)
Alien (3) Puckheads (4)  
FoDM/KB (1) Red Alert (2)  
Victors (3) Rink Rats (4)

(they just happen to be same scores as locker room assignments...how coincidental)

Hockey Break coming up for Turkey

This upcoming week is our last game before a break due to Thanksgiving.  The conclusion of those games will put a full cycle of hockey in the record books as every team should have played every other team.  I'm happy to say I've not heard very much as a whole in regards to issues or complaints.  Just like anything, I'll a few comments here and there, but not anything major.  

Keep in mind, a team may have beat you in the first go-around by many goals, but the next go-around may be your week.  Don't judge a team, player or season by a few games.  

For this week, 

Puckheads Vs Rink Rats - 

Last season's two expansion teams go head-to head in this week's match up. Rats bring an impressive 3-3 record to this game while Puckheads 2-2-2 (they don't like taking games to OT).  Both teams have their star players like Billings, Whipps & Young for Rink Rats and Hunt, Coffie and South for Puckheads, but it's going to be the role players that make the difference in this game.

Propst and Pierce have been non-factors for the Puckheads this season.  One often wonders why these 2 even play hockey, but this is their coming out party.  Each will earn their first goal of the season and contribute to the team's success.  On the flip-side, Rink Rats have their own dead weight with Evans, Dayton & Syverson.  These 3 have been a sore spot in the Rats lineup, and only remain due to sheer necessity based on others being injured.  This game will have Dayton record a hat trick while Syverson and Evans tally 2 assists each.  The game goes to the Rinks Rats by a score of 5-4.

Voodoo Vs Alien

Alien comes off a disappointing loss last week and the difference maker, Bafia was not there to help his team control the game.  This week, Bafia will be there and the results should be different.  Players like McCallum, Brand & Adams will see much less ice time on defense with Bafia back in the line up as he typically sees 45 minutes of ice times.  If guys like Knipper & Dylo don't pull their weight offensively, Joe's not afraid to take the puck up and score as he has done on countless occasions.

Voodoo's ice time hog is none other than Bentzen.  It doesn't matter if their are 4 on the bench or 40, Todd will stay on the ice until the end of period buzzer reminds him that there is a break in the action. You'd think he was a contributor to the team with those kinds of minutes, but not so much.  Word on the street was that there may have been a Whitaker sighting, but it was just a photoshopped image of a look-a-like running through the forest.  Damos, Cohan & Mudge will need to focus on this game and not the fact that they're all missing Nashville on ABC.  This one goes to Alien 6-2.

Victors Vs Red Alert

What do you get when you have hot goaltending, a powerful offense, solid defense and a good penalty kill unit?  The Chicago Blackhawks.  Red Alert on the other hand just needs Greene and Swanson to show up for the game and the rest is irrelevant.  A source close to the team (Tom Kirvan asked to remain anonymous) was stating that both Swanson and Greene would both be "no shows" for this week's game.  Both are travelling to Gary, Indiana for the filming of "Hoosiers 2 - Hockey in the Corn Fields".  That being said, guys like Curran, Worth and Becker bought an extra supply of Depends to bring to the game, as this one may get out of hand in a hurry.

Victors comes in with a strong win last week.  Marc LePera had a lights out night last week scoring a hat trick and even assisting on all 3 of his own goals.  This week, he duplicates his output and does it all in the 1st period.  Nesbit, Bartak & Hudson also have great games and each get a hat trick to add to the obnoxious score of 12-1 in favor of Victors.

Kryptonite Vs. Forklifts of Des Moines / Kyles Bikes - 

Will this be the week for the undefeated to fall?  I believe so.  The FDM/KB team looks to rest their starters in preparation of the Turkey Tourney.  "It's no different than Ovechkin telling his team that he's playing in the Olympics for his country because it's important to him" stated the Radcliff duo.  "The Turkey Tourney is our Olympics and we're resting up!"  Guys like Wahlert and Goodman don't recognize the Thanksgiving holiday so they will play this Wednesday since it's "just another day to stuff your face with turkey".  Brekke was heard saying that he won't show up to the game, but not because he's preparing for the Turkey tourney, but rather he doesn't come when he knows his good players won't make it to cover up for his lack of ability on the ice.  

Kryptonite is bringing everyone and the kitchen sink.  Their full roster consists of 22 players and all will be in attendance.  They've already been working on their bench strategy and determining who will sit on who's lap while waiting for their shift.  Miller will sit on Dean,   Hill

on Close, Gugat on Paoli and Toigo on Huyck.  This will allow for quicker and more accurate shift changes.  This excessive bench depth will prove to be a great strategy and provide FDM/KB their first loss.....6-4.

  

Happy Hockey Halloween !

Adult League Hockey and Halloween go hand in hand.  Both involve getting dressed up as something you're really not.  Some put on masks, while others just trick (and get penalties) or treat (and get goals).  This Wednesday brings some spooky pairings to the evening.

Young showing his scary side!

Red Alert Vs Puck Heads

The My Little Puckhead Ponies

This game will be like Jason Voorhees versus My Little Pony.  Have you seen Clark Hawbaker?  Word on the street is he's going to break out the Friday the 13th mask and wreak havoc on the scared group of Puckheads.  Ross, Young & Curran all plan on wearing the same costume pictured to the right and playing defense in front of the killer Hawbaker in net.  Worth & Beenen have decided they're going to tell Puckheads goalie Waters a joke just before they ring him up.  "I've got the perfect joke for those guys" said Beenen.  "What's black, hard and round and goes into a net?....a puck!"  Becker was heard saying that he' going to egg the other teams cars after the game in the spirit of Halloween.  The Puckheads take Halloween pretty seriously too.  They do it in a more fun-spirited sort of way. "This will be our 5th year getting the team together dressed in matching My Little Pony outfits" said Puckheads captain Pierce.  Its a lifelong tradition the Stouts started and now they're bringing the tradition to the team.  Coffie & Smiley agreed it sounded weird at first, but once they knew they could choose the color of their "pony" they were all for it.  Propst and Christensen refused to do it, but after much hazing and peer pressure, went out and bought matching pick ones.  This game is slanted one direction...Red Alert 7, Ponies 2.

Victors Vs. Forklifts of DM/Kyles Bikes

Bartak & Dudechenko

In the 2nd game of the night, Victors try to earn the win to go 3-1 and knock FDM/KB to 3-1 as well. The confidence of Victors is evident based on their actions the night before the game.  Where most teams typically rest up the night before a game, Team Captain Gannon decides to throw a Halloween bash.  You had the LePera brothers dressed as the Olsen twins, Hudson, Krultz & Koch representing the 3 stooges, the Pirie brothers dressed as Ashley and Jessica Simpson, Dudenchenko & Bartak represented the LA Kings and a Stanley Cup, while Gannon, Natale & Chongo wore nothing but thongs and were covered in BBQ sauce (get it?...the Famous Daves). Nesbit and Gordon bartended the affair and last I knew all crashed at Gannon's house.   Then you have the undefeated crew of FDM/KB.  You had Mellein & Roskilly reviewing game footage from previous seasons to determine how they shut down Hudson.  Williams and Wahlert discussed shift changes and how to better the rotation.  The Radcliff boys worked on their "no-look" passing, while Brekke cooked the entire team a nutritious supper before their 8 PM bedtime.   Here's a time where I think a team over-prepared and the looser, more relaxed team earns the win.  Victors 7, FDM/KB 5.

Alien Vs. Kryptonite

There cannot be a better suited match up than these 2 teams on Halloween for one sole reason. Costumes (aka....Jerseys).  These 2 teams have collectively accumulated 27 jerseys over the past 5 seasons and continue to grow their stock.  Alien Hockey brings to the table 16 of these and wears them proudly.    Guys like the Dylo brothers, LeFleur & Fascian have been with the team since the beginning and have acquired the jerseys in a financially manageable way.  They have been able to pay for them over time unlike newcomer Scott Jacobson who got the shock of his life when he was told he needed to pay $5,324 in order to "catch up" on the jersey collection.  Each player has a favorite jersey such as Bishop enjoys the "Butterfly Awareness Week" version while Brand's favorite is the Monopoly style where each player represents a different piece of property.  3 years ago, Knipper wanted to quit the team but was so deep in debt with his Alien account, he had no place to go.  Team Logo designer Clutts quit his job last year and makes enough money from his designs to afford a nice income and recently purchased a new home.

On the other bench, the Kryptonite team is making headway in the jersey war.  "We know we have to obtain 3 new jerseys each season to be on pace to catch them" said Johnson of Kryptonite.  They've also had some unique ones like the "Ross Perot for President" jersey and the "Vancouver is Burning" edition.  Laura Stein always grab 2 of each style (one in medium and the other in Goalie cut for the maternity months).  To save on expense, Schneiders and Toigo get 1 jersey to share and swap it between shifts.  Kundel and Hill think the whole idea is ridiculous and feel 1 jersey is enough, but since no other teams want them, they're left with no choice.  This game will be more of a fashion show than a hockey game, but word on the street from Rich Huyck is someone may be unveiling a new "Beverly Hill 90210 Limited Edition" jersey that evening.... ALien 6, Cup 5 (in a shootout win).


Rink Rats Vs. Voodoo

Bedwell (Rats) & Wolf (Voodoo) out Trick or Treating together.

The Voodoo name portrays a scary image.  Rink Rats aren't the most pleasant of creatures.  On this night, the stereotypes of these two hated teams gets put on hold.  Both teams know that they are the most feared, most hated and the most disgusting teams in all of the ABC League.  Both captains recognized this and decided to throw that out the window on this great Wicken Holiday.  After the game, players will unite and one member from each team will spend the night with a member of the other team doing a fun event.
Bedwell/Wolf - Trick or Treating all over Windsor Heights together in matching costumes
Mrachina/Rodriguez - Going to Jordan Creek theater to watch the Shining
Wurzer/Damos - Cooking a steak and pasta dinner together
Bremer/Cohan - Attending a scrapbooking seminar
Dayton/Bentzen - Giving each other manicures
Evans/Dawson - Playing Mario Kart on Xbox
Lundberg/Giunta Brothers - Attending the Des Moines Symphony
Young/Lieb - Tending to Lieb's broken hand
Mulcahy/McDonough - Eating the ever appropriate M&Ms together
Billings/Mudge - Volunteering at Blank Park Zoo cleaning up elephant poop
Syverson/Whitaker - Sharing a cigar talking politics
Gavin/Koenig - Riding a custom built tandem bike around Grays Lake
Kipp/Loverude - Plane ride to Kenosha, Wisconsin
Whipps/Brown - Watching the Cardinals win the next game of the World Series
Miller/Reeves - Having a friendly game of Stratego

Neither team will want to win this one, so an accidental shot that Dawson takes goes in on his own goalie for Rink Rats to win 1-0.

Koenig & Gavin making their rounds.

 

What's Actually Guaranteed in Life?

There are only 3 things guaranteed to happen this year.
1) You'll have to pay taxes
2) The Blackhawks will repeat as Stanley Cup champs (duh...)
3) My picks will always be dead on

With that, let's roll to the game predictions for Week #3.

Victors Vs. Rink Rats

Boom.  Enough said.  Victors 2, Rats 0.

Voodoo Vs. Kryptonite

Kryptonite starts the season off a disappointing 0-2.  Goalie Anderson struggling right out the gate this year and seems to be modeling his play after his idol, Bear QB Jay Cutler.  Now that Cutler is out with a groin injury, the Cup teams wishes Anderson would follow suit.  Knight and Kundel of Kryptonite have an internal feud going and can't agree on who is the better right winger.  Then they have Gugat and Miller unable to agree on what they should be drinking as a team after the game.  Gugat wants Zima while Miller pushes for an old fashioned Bartles and Jaymes.  On the flipside, the Voodoo team is starting to gel.  You've got Mudge and Brown leading a pre-game cheer while Giunta and Cohan fight for the title of "most improved player" after their disgusting performance last season. Dan Koenig has created a "MVV" Award for the "Most Valuable Voodoo" and each week's winner will get a free custom built bike and their choice of a neck tattoo. The team has also unified together to support Brett Damos' new business start-up.  He's been making "Voodoo Chips" in his basement and hopes to be selling them in stores soon.  "I've got a few solid leads from stores that want to carry my chips" proclaimed a confident Damos.  "I think we've got Beach Girls, O'Reilly's Auto Parts and the neighborhood elementary school on board to buy a few bags".  This type of team bonding leads me to choose them over Cup O' Kryptonite in this week's match up.  Voodoo 5, Cup 2.


Alien Vs. Puckheads

After being outscored 19-4, the Alien crew is looking for something...some spark, some sort of ignition switch to get this engine running.  This spark plug may be in the form of newcomer Scott Jacobson. Scott comes to Alien via Red Alert.  He was drafted in 2012 by Red Alert in the 6th round and they were hoping for a utility player but nothing more.  "I needed more than that" said Scott. "I led my Peewee team to the Semi-finals back in the day and everyone looked at me as a leader."  It's this type of winning experience Alien is thirsting for.  Brand & Knipper of Alien have such heavy loaded long term contracts that there was not anything left to compensate Scott.  After much negotiation, he offered to pay the team $4,500, the first 4 weeks of complimentary beverages after the game and would do the team's laundry.  Alien accepted and the rest is history.   With the Puckheads, a 1-1 start to the season is a breath of fresh air.  Newcomers like Richardson, Whipple and Devera bring something to this team that they've never had.....talent.  You can make a case that Hickey, Smiley and Hunt had some offense last season, but that still got them a last place finish in their conference last season.  Team captain Pierce knows that his role is to make last season's "has beens" mesh with this year's talent.  So far, mission accomplished.  With guys like James Chung and John "Decaf" Coffie holding the team together, this season will be much different than the last.  Puckheads 6, Alien 3.

Forklifts of Des Moines/Kyles Bikes Vs. Red Alert

We need to refer to the last game of the night as the Marquee Match Up.  These games are the important ones since nobody knows what to expect in regards to attendance or the state of mind of the players, yet these games count the same in the standings.  FDM/KB has generated 19 goals in 2 games thus far.  That's more than Rink Rats had all last season.  William Jackson leads the team with 5 goals, while goalie Goeke has only allowed 2 goals in both of these games (to which he still says were not his fault and blames his defensemen Lasnek for both).  However, none of this has happened in the late game.  Players like Roskilly, Seebeck & Hansen are all in bed by 10 PM.  The Hrabak boys start their drinking at 9:45 PM, so by game time, they'll be luck to tie their laces.  Mellein has already told Captain Goodman to text him game updates while Wahlert and the Radcliffs will be watching the Cardinals/Red Sox World Series game.  I'd say Goeke would be thankful if Lasnek shows just to have a body on the ice, but we all know that will hurt them more than help.  The Red Alert team has a different approach.  Most of their players work for Dusty Beenen's business.  He owns a Guinea Pig ranch just outside of Waukee and the majority of his teammates are his employees.  "Most of the guys are just wranglers" described Beenen.  "Their job is to round up the pigs if they start to stray."  Experienced Wrangler and star forward Shaun Greene loves the ranch.  He starts his day at 4 AM getting food and water for the GPs (that's what they call the guinea pigs on the ranch) and by the time 9 PM rolls around, he's ready for a hockey break.  Brett Swanson and Chris Schroeder share grooming duties.  Brett's a 17 year professional Guinea Pig groomer and has worked at some of the most famous GP Ranches in LA.  You may think Schroeder is a defensive specialist on the ice, but his real calling is pedicures for the furry friends.  He can trim about 4 GPs an hour....5 if he's really pushing.  It's the early games that get these guys since Beenen wants them all to finish their chores prior to playing, so the late game he looks forward to.  Attendance wins this one with Red Alert 8, FDM/KB 4.

Spotlight - Red Alert

Our league showcases some of Des Moines' finest hockey talent every Wednesday night.  Most fans who attend and follow our league know our players by their hockey skills and ability, but don't know the player's off-ice activities and accomplishments.  We will begin showcasing many of our players throughout the season to give all our fans an inside look at the secret side of our athletes.

This edition focuses on Red Alert teammates Josh Feathers and Tony Hansen.  Most know Tony as Red Alert's standout goalie last season, and now star defenseman.  Josh "Dobbie" Feathers replaced Tony this season as the team's captain due to his leadership on and off the ice.  Even though most associate these 2 players as the best in the game of hockey, they don't know how Tony & Dobbie  dominate in another arena.

On July 4th, 2001, Tony was sitting on his sofa drinking a Heineken while flipping through the channels on TV.  He ran across the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest and witnessed Takeru Kobayashi down 50 hot dogs and buns in 10 minutes to win the event.  A phone call to his good friend Dobbie was made shortly after and their future was about top change.

Tony & Dob entered the obscure world of Tag Team Food Eating and began what can now be considered a dynasty.  They've traveled the world, competed and won many titles.  These titles include:
World Food Tag Team Champions - 2003, 2004, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012
US National Tag Team Champions - 2002 - 2012
Italian Pizza Eating Title  - 2007, 2008, 2010, 2012
No-Hands Chili Eating Spectacular - 2008, 2009, 2010
Red Lobster "All you can Eat" Shrimp Competition 2012,2013

Once they made the decision to jump into the food eating ring, the results were remarkable.  In their rookie season, they took the national tour by storm and won the US title in 2002.  They have dominated the American circuit by winning 11 consecutive National titles.

Hansen & Feathers 2009 Nationals

Most have seen the individual eating contests and understand that the winner is decided by who can eat the most in a specific amount of time.  In Tag Team eating, the teammates must feed each other.  This is where a connection between partners is key.

Young Feathers in training

"I know exactly how fast I can shove a taco in Tony's mouth" stated Dobbie.  Most teams buckle under the pressure and panic during an event.  They see their opponents leading and they start to shovel food to their partner faster.  "Not us" said Tony, "I can sense when Dob is about to hurl and I back off."  It's this type of non-verbal communication that allows them to be successful.  This was evident in 2007 at the World Championships in Riga, Latvia.  With 3 minutes left, Tony & Dob were down to the German team of Zimmerman/Klein.  The Germans were ahead by 9 meatballs and felt like the title was in hand.  They made the mistake of "gapping" (defined as taking a quick drink between food consumption).  Tony & Dobbie noticed this move and believed this was the much needed mistake they were looking for. "I saw that look in Tony's eyes that said 'you just keep feeding me those meatballs' and I knew it was on" said Dobbie  They were right.  At a rate of 47 MPM (meatballs per minute) during the last 3 minutes, the US duo beat the Defending champs to take the World Title once again.

Hansen showing off in lounge

So the next time you make a move around Tony on the ice, or steal the puck from Feathers when he's on a break away, don't make the mistake of going out to eat with them and trying to challenge to a wing eating competition.

Week 1 for Underdogs...What happens in Week #2?

Last week I went 3-1 with my predictions.  I chose the Underdogs based on last year's performance and it turned out as expected.  Although I did not predict the beatdown Alien took in the season opener....but we'll save that for another time.

The league parity is something we've strived for and I've said it many times that any team can win on any night...but a lot of factors come into play.  Who shows up?  How many on bench?  Do we have a sub goalie?  Did we go out drinking prior to our 10:45 game?  All these can affect the outcome of a game for any team.  In the end, it was nice to see some new teams rise to the win column in Week #1.

Week #2 brings more great match ups.

Game 1 showcases the talents of Defending Champs Kryptonite against the always commanding Victors.  Do you know wat you get if you do a Google Image search for "Victors Kryptonite"?  You guessed it.... a picture of Tim Kirgan (Kryptonite) with a German Shepherd.  No, I'm not kidding. Do you know the meaning of this?  Loosely translated, it means that Cup O' K plans to "let the dawgs out" all over Victors in this first game.

Krultz (Victors) scored the only 2 goals during last week's games and had this to say about the rest of his team. "Seriously?  We sign the LePeras to long term deals and they dont even show up?" questioned Krultz.  "They're more like the LePerros....a bunch of dogs."    As Gannon was seen leaving their sponsor's establishment, he was asked what he thought of his team's chances against Cup.  "All shall pass and unto them shall begotten a true response that is most epic."

 

On the other side, Kryptonite is ready to move forward from their opening week defeat.  It was a bad sign when they raised their championship banner to the rafters only to have Kipp & Gavin from Rink Rats

climb up and set in on fire.  Although not a true showing of sportsmanship, it must have worked since they beat Cup last week.  This week Cup O' K brings a healthy Gugat (neck sprain) back into the first line.  Paoli and Miller of Cup don't believe Gugat is first line material, but linemate Paoli says "Who Dat? Gugat!"  Prediction is Kryptonite gets their first win and Victors starts the season 0-2.  Cup 5 - Victors 1.

Game 2 has us flashback to a game in 1994.  The first ever meeting between these 2 teams made Adult League history.  A young 14 year goaltender Hansen (Red Alert) had to show a fake ID to join the league but was able to face 118 shots by an Alien Team that was led by a much older captain LeFleur (Alien). The puck never left Red Alerts zone except for 1 play that appeared to be icing, but a bad bounce off a divot created by figure skaters headed towards a frozen Alien goalie named Ben Hudson and proceeded to go in.  At that time, nobody could have predicted that the score would have ended 1-0 based on the shots on goal.  The rest is history.  LeFleur was demoted to a 3rd line right winger and signed a lifetime Alien contract where he was paid nothing but was required to buy a new jersey every year.  Hansen went on to play goalie for many years for Red Alert, but this season is looking to contribute on the scoring end.  The added twist to this game is the back room trade deal in the off-season that had top defenseman for Red Alert last season, Scott Jacobson move to the Alien team.  "I talked to their captain Feathers and told him that Jacobson broke both his legs in a skydiving accident" stated new Alien captain Beede. "It was such a lie and he bought it, so they put him on waivers and we grabbed him."  This bad blood is going to spill over into the game as Jacobson's roommate Scholz for the last 9 years had this to say, "if he thinks he's getting his pink curtains back, he's crazy."  Red Alert comes to get even on this night and wins...of course....1-0.

Game #3

Goodman delivering present to his team.

The Rink Rats showed domination last week, so can they continue that over the also dominating Forklift crew?  Both teams enter this game with wins last week and now it's time to determine who will be 2-0. Lasnek of Irwins is guaranteeing a win this week and has decided that if Forlifts lose, he will buy everyone from both teams pizza and beer up in the lounge after the game. "I'm so confident in my team's ability that I'm willing to throw my money on the table."  Rink Rats captain Dayton feels Lasnek better get his money ready.  "We've come a long way since last season" announced Dayton.  This is true as their team has been preparing for this season and plans on running the table to a 29-0 record.  This will be a tough feat, but one I think they may accomplish.  Win number 2 goes to the Rats by a score of 5-2.

Game #4

Voodoo and Puckheads meet in the late night game and both teams expect 100% attendance.  Voodoo still stewing about their loss by 1 point last week has made some changes to their line up.  They've moved Wolf to a 4th line and may only play him 1-2 shifts.  Interim team leader Bentzen felt like anyone drafted as the last pick of a scramble league doesn't deserve to play as much as Wolf does.  The Puckheads on the other hand bring tons of firepower to the game.  Hickey (who loves late games), Propst (who just had his skates sharpened for the first time in 3 years ) and Davis Stout ( had to get a special driving permit to attend the late game) will all be ready to showcase their speed.  Past superstars like Smiley have been overshadowed by some of the new blood on the team.  "I feel like a 20 year veteran of the league" said Smiley. "I think I'll retire after this season since I've lost more than just a step".  We'll miss you Smiley, but in the end your team still gets the win tonight  6-3 over Voodoo.

     

5th Year Begins and So Do the Predictions

Another ABC League season is upon us and everyone is ready to go.  I have many goals for this upcoming season (leading the league in scoring is not one of them).  I'd like to get back to what I do best and that's analyzing our league games and dominating in the predictions department.  Why not start now and show many of the new players why I'm banned from gambling on adult hockey in Vegas and 4 other foreign countries.  Here goes:

The 8-Ball don't lie.  I asked if Cup O' Kryptonite would repeat as champs and you can CLEARLY see that they will not.  The KryptoNOTs return all their players, but in what condition?  They have a returning player that will be a mother of 2. Seriously, the best she's going to do is change Gugat's diaper while he lays passed out on the bench with an empty pitcher in his grasp.  With guys like Knight, Kundel & Toigo all one year closer to 50 and a guy with a nickname of Chris "Over the" Hill, you're bound to lose a lot of speed.  So if Johnson thinks keeping this AARP group of under-achievers together is the best course of action, then we'll see them knocked out in the 1st round f playoffs.

So that being said, my predictions by Conference are:

Hops Conference
1 - Puckheads
2 - Voodoo
3 - Red Alert
4 - Alien

Barley Confeence
1- Victors
2 - Rink Rats
3 - FDM/Kyles Bikes
4 - Kryptonite

League Champions : Rink Rats

Oh, some may think I'm crazy, but I know things.  Marine-Biologist and team left winger Brad Bedwell of Rink Rats has been brewing up a concoction to get his team faster, leaner and stronger.  Mrachina comes back for his 2nd season and with a supporting cast of some new additions, this team will be tough to beat in the long run.  They won't win the conference due to some suspect goaltending, but I foresee Victors bowing out in the 1st round and the Rats winning on conditioning alone.


Now I know many used to count on me for these updates and facts along with the predictions so they can lay a few bucks down on the games, so I must give the Week #1 predictions.

Game 1 - Forklifts of Des Moines/Kyles Bikes Vs. Alien
Long name...no so amazing results.  Did the FDM/Kyles team get better in off-season? Yes.  The Forklift team of Lasnek, Radcliff & Radcliff designed and built an Alien Forklift to try and have the team scrimmage against a team of these machines to simulate what it's like to play against Alien.  Needless to say, you can't create McCallum, Bishop & Clutts in an enginering lab.  Mellein (FDM/Kyle) practiced ways to shut down the machine's circuitry, but it ended ugly as he suffered 3rd degree electrical burns and may not play in game 1. This games is close, but Alien still gets the win 4-2 while FDM/KB gets some cool toys that they can train to serve beer.

Game 2 - Cup O' Kryptonite Vs Rink Rats

Here's the highlight game of the week.  Last year's worst plays last year's first in this duel.  "We want to be the underdog" states Gavin of the Rats, "Nobody expects us to be good, so its time to show them what's up!"  Last year, the team new it was a building year.  Guys like Young, Wurzer & Whipps couldn't carry the team all alone, so this off-season they've asked for others to step it up.  New additions like Mulcahy &
Billings were brought in to get the team fired up and not make Dayton do everything by himself.  The Rats were life-less test subjects, but this year they plan on tearing through the competition.  On the flip-side, you've got guys who are in the last year of their contract, ready to retire and coming off a lucky win in the championship game.  Stein (Kryptonite) just got married and has other things on his mind, while Huyck tries to remember if he's going to play in Omaha or Syracuse this weekend in an adult tourney.  "The focus is just not there anymore" exclaimed Kirgan of Kryptonite, "Our team is just trying to do....the fact of the matter is...what was I talking about?"  As you can see, the team is falling apart and it's just a matter of time before they ask to shake hands after the 2nd period.  Rink Rats win 6-2.

Game 3 - Red Alert Vs. Voodoo

This is a tough one.  Red Alert brings in goaltender Clarke Hawbaker and his circa 1924 facial protection. Clarke wrapped up a season in the Malaysian Pro League a few months back where he was 97-1-3.  "We often played 4 games in one night, but the $6/day pay was well worth it" said Hawbaker.  Newcomers Brueck and Schroeder add some KAPOW to the lineup and each should be good for at least a hat trick per game.  Returning power man Feathers looks to lead the Red Alert team to a +.500 season this year and has just the supporting staff to do it.  Although Greene did not perform to everyone's expectations, he had a long off season which he spent with teammate Paul Curran and learned a few tricks.  Voodoo on the other hand was a powerful force and one I predicted would do well last season.  They return almost all their players and plan on being even a greater force.  "We're playing as though we're running for office" stated the team's only Democrat Dan Koenig, "You say Obamacare and we say Voodoodontcare".  The Nick-Nick combination of Dawson and Giunta are back for another year where they work together like twins separated at birth.  "We finish each other's sentences, find each other with perfect passes and even share each other's clothes" proclaimed the better looking Nick.  I think goaltending makes the difference this evening and the slight edge goes to Jason Voorhees...Red Alert 3 Voodoo 2.
 
Game 4 - Puckheads Vs. Victors

"I wish I had all the late games" stated an excited Dustin Gordon (Victors).  Gordon, an unemployed butterfly collector, likes to sleep during the days so he gets up by 7 PM to stroll over to the rink to get his weekly exercise.  The Victors team team is the NY Yankees of our league.  Big payrolls, big talent, big egos and big "fall on their face" when it counts.  The only team that has 4 sets of siblings.  LePera/LePera, Pirie/Pirie, Dudechenko/Chongo,  & Krultz/Schumacher show that family can play together...they just can't win together.  Not sure that Gannon can keep this team focused, but he's going to try.  Puckheads were another team bottom feeding last season.  Guys like Hickey & Smiley were brought in last year to help move the team forward, but the disappointment was evident after the first few weeks.  This was even more apparent when only 6 people showed up to Ryan Smiley Bobblehead night.  The team leaders of Hunt and Propst stepped it up last season when it mattered , but it wasn't enough.  "I had to bring in some young talent" threatened coach and captain Brian Pierce. "Richardson, Whipple and Devera were signed in the offseason to light a fire under some of the lazy veterans like Coffie and Chung"  I watched some of their off-season training and the military-like sessions were crazy.  I think we're looking at a good team this year.  Puckheads 9 Victors 3.

That's all for now and as always, no need to pay me for the picks, but I do ask if you win and coin from my knowledgeable assessments, just buy me a beer when you see me.

Lace 'em Up! League is starting.

Pictured above is Ben Hudson (Victors) attempting to bat a puck out of the air to score while Eric Jacobson (Alien) works hard to make the save.  Here is just an example of what many of our ABC League players do in the off-season to stay in shape for our soon to start regular season.

The 5th year of the ABC League is about to begin this Wednesday and teams have been getting back into game shape the last 4 weeks by playing our scramble games.  

Our league has made grown over the past 5 years and we have all the players to thank for that.  We still sit at 8 teams and could have grown into even more if the ice time was available.  With each year, we look to make changes and improvements and this year is no different.  The addition of a scorekeeper was added to help track stats, penalties as well as do "stop clock" the last minutes should a game be within 1 goal.

My hope is that this seasons 5th Year Anniversary is one of our best yet.  Hope to see everyone at the arena!

Scramble Hockey Time

The long awaited scramble draft has occurred and the teams are listed below.
The first person listed is the captain who drafted the team.  The order shows how each player was drafted.  Much discussion, debate and beer went into each meticulous pick.

I will have a draft recap soon, but wanted everyone to at least see where they are playing next week.  Your team number is how the schedule is made.  The schedule was sent out in an earlier email on the google group.  The "Home" will always wear light and away will wear dark.

If I missed someone, let me know.

Team 1
Darren Stout
Jason Mrchina
Scott Anderson
Joe Bafia
Dan Becker
Nataliya Dudechenko
Jason Seebeck
Shon McDonough
Mike Beede
James Chung
Adam Keller
Will Koch
Jarod Devera
Jason Wolf

Team 2
Dave Natale
Mike Dylo
Tony Toigo
Matt Whitaker
Jerome Miller
Nick Worth
Davis Stout
Andrew Mellein
Dave Lundberg
Ryan LePera
Nate Brand
Cody Gavin
John Coffie
Bill Goodman
Adam Schneiders

Team 3
Rich Huyck
Josh Feathers
Chris LeFleur
Dustin Gordon
Jim Goeke
Dan Koenig
Brent Hanke
Jon Young
Tim Kirgan
Dave Swift
Lisa Schumacher
Tom Kirvan
Mike Herrmann
Dave Chongo
Mike Fascian

Team 4
Nick Radcliff
Erik Keese
Travis Hunt
Nick Giunta
Nick Dawson
Brad Bedwell
Dan Bishop
Mitch Stein
Scott Roskilly
Alex Richardson
Bret Christian
Dave Gannon
David Ross
Scott Brueck
Tim Close

Team 5
Paul Knight
Bret Damos
Chris Hill
Ben Hudson
Chad Waters
Paul Adams
Chris Schroeder
Justin Williams
Pat Houlihan
Tony Hansen
Matt Whipps
Paul Curran
Paul Nesbit
Monty Brown
Shane Young

Team 6
Mark Dylo
Adam Krultz
Ben Paoli
Don Mudge
Rich Hrabak
Bret Swanson
Sean Bremer
Josh Whipple
Kacy Reeves
Aaron Clutts
Dave Miller
Ryan Syverson
Mike Bartak
Brian Gugat
Eric Kipp

Team 7
Todd Bentzen
Marc LePera
Jeremy Knipper
Ryan Smiley
Matt Johnson
Rick Radcliff
Dusty Beenen
Jeff Dayton
Eric Jacobson
Matt Haynes
Tony Lieb
Gregory Propst
Scott Jacobson
Dustin Pirie
Brian Pierce

Team 8
Shaun Greene
Derek Hickey
Javi Rodriguez
Brad Dean
Brendan McCallum
Nathan Pirie
Nick Hrabak
Mark Wurzer
Scott Kundel
Mark Scholz
Adam Lowell
Chris Hansen
Mark Loverude
Rich Cohan
John Evans

May Double Hockey Sticks 3 on 3 Tourney

To help put a grand finale on the Fall/Winter Season, we present the "MAY Double Hockey Sticks"  3 on 3 Tourney.

Date: Saturday, May 11 (get it... "double hockey sticks")

Time: 4 PM - 9 PM (approx)

Where: Bucs Arena

Cost: $40/player $15/goalie (if registered by April 20th)

Your fee includes:

• 4 Games guaranteed
• Food during event
• Jersey (choose your size if register by 4/20)
• Great times with great friends

Keep in mind we are limited to 48 player and 8 Goalie spots and the last St. Patty's event was a sellout.  Hope to see you there and spread the word.

St. Pattys Event is Success

Another successful 3 on 3 tourney is in the record books.  We sold out another event (all 48 player and 8 goalie spots) were filled and this created a great exciting atmosphere.

Congrats to Team Notre Dame for winning the Championship.  The team consisted of Whipps, Henle Jr., N. Radcliff, Strodtman, Gorelik, Becker and Pentico (even though goalies switch).

I have received many emails already from players thanking me for this great event, but in reality, its the interest of all the players that keeps these events going.  If it wasn't for the great attitudes and good sportsmanship over the last several tourneys, the interest would die down.  So for that I thank everyone.

A special thanks to Aaron Clutts for putting together another fine looking logo.  Aaron got sick just prior to the event so this allowed a late minute add on player a chance to play.  Thanks Aaron and hope you're feeling better.

See everyone at Cinco de Mayo!

Who Will Hoist the Cup?

I finally got the cup back from the engravers and it looks good.   As the season rolls on, the quest for the cup continues.  Here are the standings up to this point.


Voodoo      11-0-0
Victors     8-2-1
Alien             7-4-0
Red Alert     6-4-1
Kryptonite    5-5-1
Puckheads    3-8-0
FoDM/KB    3-8-0
Rink Rats     1-10-0